Teen Time

I thought for sure Blogger would've scrapped this ancient and neglected blog.  Since, I actually have some time this morning to write through some thoughts & feelings, I'm glad my cyber footprint wasn't washed away.  After sharing a Facebook status about my teenagers, I realized I needed to give myself a pep talk and the mini sermon I deserve. My kids aren't interested in fb, therefore they don't read what I share. So I'm not suffering from guilt, but don't want to have more regrets about the way I live my life.  Therefore, it's time to give my attitude a make over concerning this season of life!!

These pimply, smelly, awkward, grumpy and sometimes ungrateful adolescent people will grow up and forget many of the things they said in frustration, be embarrassed by how they looked and acted, and wish they'd been more thankful.  They will always remember though, MY prevailing attitude and actions.  What do I want them to remember and what do I want to know is true about my innermost thoughts that mold my words & actions?  Right now the truth isn't pretty. Yep, time redo this room of my heart.

OK, instead of being bogged down by the grubby daily outlook, I need some vision to put  this short season in perspective.   Must remember there are 5 of these wild & woolly creatures and instead of the "more the merrier", "the more the scarier" is how things feel but actually we'll get through it quite quickly and then have a long break before it's the littlest one's turn to develop her wings.

The positives I've forgotten:
This is the only time I get to be the Best Woman in the World to 2 tall young men by fixing large amounts of warm food. They'll have wives to become spellbound by and brag on.
As I sit at my end of the table and hear, "This tastes amazing mom!", and "Wow, you did it again!", isn't what makes the hours on my feet in the kitchen instead of the gym and the bulk of my budget on food instead of style, worth it.  It's their smiles of contentment, knowing they have a place to be filled physically and a place of belonging at the table and in my heart that urges me to make it happen.
That weird musky, sweaty and odd hormonal  smell of kids in the throngs of growth spurts filling my house, means they have a safe place to park those hardening muscles and raging hormones. As they learn how to get a grip on oily hair, skin issues and a body that sometimes seems to change in size and shape overnight, am I handling it in an encouraging way? Or, do they see in my eyes condemnation for not getting it right yet again, which confirms  the world's idea that it's straight teeth, clear skin and "great" body that makes a person beautiful?
While I've tried to cultivate a learning environment to feed them mentally & spiritually, it's time to make for certain  they have a safe place with me to develop emotionally & relationally. Instead of zoning out over another joke I don't find at all entertaining,  a new list of facts on a subject I know or care anything about and doesn't seem realavent  or another silly emotional outburst about something that doesn't seem eternally important, I have to be willing to truly listen so THEY can work through putting things in perspective. Once they leave it will be possible for them to hide from me the issues their struggling with. I have them here now with  the knowledge and opportunity to pray for their needs specifically. Right now I can give hugs, pats on the back, smiles, brownies, play their favorite games, and listen with an open heart. The things that can make growing up just a tad less painful are easy to give. As their responsibilities & burdens grow their pain won't so quickly or easily be eased. Most importantly we have the privilege of growing in grace together by seeing each other at our worse and still offering our best. And when our best isn't enough, He is.
It's those too old enemies- selfishness & pride that make the most important things seem too costly to enjoy. While I've used the skills my mom taught me about making things as lovely as possible on a tight budget, I've forgotten that thankfulness & contentment can turn a plain earthly tent into a beautiful sanctuary of praise. That's the makeover I'm working towards.